My Next Book

I've decided that I'm going to write a psychology book that is based on people's license plates. My feelings are that you can tell a lot about a person based on the words that you can spell out with the letters on their licenses plate.

Now, don't write this off as being an inaccurate theory, or 'junk science' as I can prove that my theory is correct based on case studies that I have done.

For instance, my mother's license plate spells 'AZY'. I'm not making this up. It says lazy. My mother is pretty lazy.

My Grandmother's license plate is QUL, or, quarrelsome. My Grandmother likes to fight with everyone.

Brian's licenses plate spells ME. I asked him if it was a vanity plate, as Brain is know for being slightly self absorbed, and he smacked me.

I have Bekki so convinced of my theory, that when I told her that her license plate spelled rags, (RGS) she went down and got a different plate when it was time to renew her plates on E.J's birthday.

I remember once at the DMV the lady there tried to give me a plate I needed to get for my car that spelled VDD. I refused it. I stood there shaking my head and said, "No."
When she asked me why I didn't want the plate I told her that it was because it spelled, "Venereal Diseased" and I didn't want that to be indicative of my personality or most notable trait.

She told me she didn't care what my license plate spelled, I had to take that plate, or spend another $20 for a plate with a picture of a bridge on it.

So I bought the plate with the bridge instead, and it spells ADV, which I say clearly spells advanced.

I bet I'll sell over 20 million copies of my book when I get through writing this out.