My Job at the Health Food Store

I miss my job at the Health food store. I wish I had never quit, but I was seriously afraid that I would stay there forever and never leave.
There was a lady who'd worked there for 17 years back when I worked there. She's probably been there 20, or 21 years now.
I just kept thinking to myself, "If you don't leave now, you're gonna be here forever selling people granola."
I've got some great stories from that place. Some of the people who consider Health Food Stores to be their hangouts are certifiably insane.
I remember how people used to stand in the produce section examining the organic vegetables. I happened to notice one day that a woman was holding a melon while tipping forward on her feet, and then leaning backwards. I decided to investigate the matter. And so, I ambled over to the lady and I asked her,
"Ma'am, what are you doing with that melon?"
She told me that if she tipped forward with the melon in hand, then that meant that the melon would be good for her to eat. But that if she tipped backwards, it was bad for her. She was having a hard time deciding, I guess, because she kept tipping back and forth.
After I noticed the lady with her melon, I began to notice that many of the shoppers employed this particular practice when attempting to choose their fruits and vegetables.
You'd see them all lined up in the produce section, tipping this way and that, while they held the prduce in their arms.
Once, I was even asked to come to the aid of a woman who wanted me to push down on her arm in order to test her grapes. What she did was, she jutted her arm straight out from her body, so that she made a right angle there, where he armpit was. Then, she asked me to try to force her arm back down by her side. If I could force her arm down, then she wouldn't buy the grapes because they would be bad for her.
Fortunately, her arm put up a fair amount of resistance, and so she went ahead and bought the grapes.
Another time, some woman came in and asked me to find her a piece of sting. This I dutifully did, and curious for as to why she wanted this string, I then stood and watched her. What she did amazed me. She took her wedding ring off, threaded the string through the hole of the ring, and then tied the strings end. After which, she hung this make-shift pendulum over the vitamins in the vitamin section. Whenever the ring would spin in a circle when she held it over a bottle of vitamins, she'd then buy those particular vitamins. When she was all through dowsing out the vitamins, that woman spent a sum total of $124.46 on vitamins. I remember the total because while I was checking out her vitamins I kept asking her, "Are you sure you can mix all these vitamins? Are you sure these vitamins aren't going to kill you?" And then I looked up at the total on the register and I said in shock, "Wholly shit, you just spent $124.46 on vitamins!"
She told me that her subconscious mind and energy field had chosen all the vitamins so she was certain that she needed them all.
I was just like, if you say so lady.